I would make children with you.

Seth brought home a Soda Stream seltzer maker a few days ago. It is absolutely the best thing that has ever happened to me.

I am not exaggerating whatsoever.

OK, maybe not the best EVER. But it definitely kicks anything else’s ass this week. I love it more than Snookibat (pictured below) and I pretty much figuring out how to own a pet bat in NYC because I am so obsessed with that little fucker. GET ONE. (Soda Stream, not Snookibat. However, you are welcome to breed a Pauly D bat. Ohmigod, imagine it on the turntables).