Archive for July, 2009

Two things.

July 21, 2009

Where the fuck is PETA?!?!?


lady gag better watch her back, cause miss P isnt afraid to defend her man. see what happened when someone just winked at kermie?



July 17, 2009

it has been a dream of mine to get on

now.. before i draw up the blueprints, there are two snacks that im considering that have not been done, which should i attempt?

A) Combos-CCP

or B)


your vote counts. and if you take my idea and pimp it first, i will hunt you down,. wrap you in a giant pretzel and dip you in rainbow chip icing. thanks!

July 17, 2009

i google imaged “‘i hate flying” and this is the fourth picture to pop up..


I hate flying too.
525 x 372 – 38k – jpg

Hate flying too, huh? i guess this guy also hates really shitty collages. who doesnt?!

take me down to the panama city

July 17, 2009

where the grass is green and the wine is shitty.

last day.. then back to the grind….


margaritas at the beach..


capped with dads famous apple pie *yes he scored “will do comedy for pie”on the top. oh pops!


probably a good time to quit

July 15, 2009

A New Hampshire man got an overdraft fee from his bank only to find out he had been charged $23,148,855,308,184,500 for a pack of smokes. damn son!

thats probably a time to try the patch. speaking of, my friend tony below keeps saying he only smokes when he drinks and im beginning to think he might actually have a problem.


maybe im overacting.


July 14, 2009

Hart Kids Heat Shot

theres a special time in a parents life when all three of their kids awkward phases align. 


*oh to be able to wear head to toe gingham spandex again. my necklace was a plastic heart that held 3 heart shaped crayons in it. they dont make jewelry like they used to. or silk shirts. whats up fish bone number that dave is wearing, hello!

im tellin ya, it was an oprah moment

July 14, 2009

last weekend on the way to prospect park, someone had put a crate of books they did not want anymore on the sidewalk- in true brooklyn fashion. there were at least 15 Catcher in the RYe school edition.. which I have never read. so i grabbed a copy and started reading a few days later.


Cut to a few days ago I am switching planes in the atlanta terminal on my way to my folks place in florida. seated beside me at the gate in a sweet lil old man who interrupts my reading and asks if i like the book, if its still relevant, etc. he tells me that he read it in college, wont disclose how long ago that was, and tells me he wouldn’t mind reading it again. we board. i finish the book on the plane then walk up to his seat and hand it over to him to his delight.

i paid it forward yall!

* dont worry, i will be back with less adorable and more perverse ridiculous stories soon enough*

This just in!

July 9, 2009

Animals hate transportation!

Yesterday in Germany, traffic was stopped when a drunk badger (after eating too many over ripe cherries) walked unto the highway and refused to move.


Also yesterday, a group of 78 diamondback terrapins came out of a nearby bay and unto the runway of JFK airport- causing numerous flight delays!


Damn son. Last night I was on the R train and like 3 rats scurried right in front of the train at 14th st. oh yeah, and no one cared. All hail the power of cute!

July 9, 2009

thanks for coming out

July 8, 2009

really baby dressed as gorilla, i have to commend you on making the effort to show up and waste my time. seriously, must i say it baby dressed as gorilla?

baby gorillas are cuter than babies dressed as gorillas.



whats that baby dressed as gorilla? sympathy vote? you think he got a sympathy vote cause he got some medical attention? how dare you. how. dare. you. his eyes are staring into my soul and his tongue is just the slightest bit out. its called adorable, and you could learn a few things. now, if you dont mind, get the hell off my blog baby dressed as gorilla.